Ha’s Snack Bar has been on my bucket list forever.

The tiny lower east side Vietnamese restaurant, owned by chefs Sadie Mae Burns-Ha and Anthony Ha, is a highly acclaimed, intimate French-Vietnamese fusion spot  with an ever evolving menu.

My daughter actually made it to Ha’s last week, lining up at 5pm on a Thursday night for a 5:30pm opening.

Three hours later she was seated at Ha’s.

She holds control of the knife this week so let’s see if she fillets Ha’s Snack Bar or slices through the offerings and serves up a positive review.

This is her story of dining in one of New York City’s impossible to get into restaurants.

I can only compare my experience at Ha’s to a long anticipated first date.

You match with someone online, you text, you text, you text more (when did men become so chatty?) and finally, weeks later, you meet for a first date.

You’re excited, a little nervous, and a bit anxious that you waited so long for what could either be the love of your life or another boring loser. 

Ha’s wasn’t a loser, but I definitely felt like I was settling.

At Ha’s, I arrived at 5pm for a 5:30pm opening. I missed a seat by one couple and what was projected to be a 1.5 hour wait turned into 3 painful hours.

We passed the time by doing what any sane person begging for a table in NYC would do…drank too much (Attaboy on Eldridge is a great way to pass the time).

It would be one thing if we knew it was three hours from the jump, but every 20 minutes we’d receive a text from the charmless hostess, “you’re next!.”

As in life, I found myself in a situation where there was a lot of texting and very little action. So the date/table finally arrived and we were seated.

The intros started off ok. The server did her best to charm. The Watercress Salad with sesame, herbs and peanuts tasted like LAX’s take on Wolfgang’s famous Chinese Chicken Salad ($20).

It was followed by their “most popular” dish Egg Mayo. Since it was the second night of Passover, I can only compare it to a gentile in a men’s warehouse suit with a nice watch his dad gave him. Unimpressive basics, but at least we gilded the lily with trout roe ($16).

Then came the Snails with Tamarind Butter. Interesting, but the French original is far superior ($23).

I didn’t even have to work hard for the next dish…an uninspired Pork Sausage with sweet chili that lacked flavor and overcompensated with too much spice ($26).

Final savory dish was Clams with Chinese Bacon & Ginger nuoc mam which were good, not exceptional, like most men you meet online ($25).

Finally, and most women can sadly relate, the meal ended with a completely unsatisfactory finish. The Lemon and Almond Cake tasted boxed ($18). Not in a frosting in a tub kind of way because that’s my favorite food group. It tasted artificial and all together disappointing.

After a night of waiting, the best I can give Ha’s Snack Bar is a major meh.

So we set off into the night four hours later, unfulfilled, lusting after a better sausage.

Ha’s Snack Bar 297 Broome Street New York City. Open Tuesday-Saturday 5:30-10:30pm. Reservations on RESY, but impossible to obtain.